10-8-10 Giving birth to 5000 white blood cells

Today I went to work and stayed the whole day...Ok, I left campus for an hour or so to eat and rest...I am amazed that I was able to make it through today.  I am no longer nauseous, tired, or weak in any way.  The side effect of the day was excruciating pain in my thigh bones and the bones between my wrist and elbows.

It started yesterday.  I was feeling achy and it was hard to move around freely.  I thought it was just my body reacting to everything it had been through and didn't think much of it.  As the day went on, I started feeling more and more pain.  It started to feel like my thigh and arm bones were being split in half.  Walking was becoming more and more difficult.  I was also worried that I would spontaneously scream in the middle of class.  I spoke to the nurse at my doctor's office about another issue at first.  She called to tell me that I am anemic/iron deficient and need an iron supplement.  She thought that would help with my fatigue.  The nurse also told me that other than the anemia, my white blood count and platelets were quite excellent for where I was in the chemo process.  A week before, I had a shot called neulasta that is supposed to boost white blood cells for immunity.  I told the nurse I was getting unexplicably achy and it was getting hard to walk.  She told me it was the neulasta shot really kicking in and that it affects the big bones in the body.  One of the side effects is achyness...That is  the understatement of the century.

I decided that the pain I felt today was akin to giving birth..My bones gave birth to 5000 white blood cells.  If I knew it was going to be this painful, I would have gotten an epidural and had a baby shower before hand! (I should at least get some fucking gifts out of this!!) My parents came to pick me up for lunch at school.  By the time they got me in the car (which I could barely do myself), I was a slobbering bawling mess.  They got me back to their house, fed me lunch and I took an aleve and a darvocet. 
Eventually the meds kicked in after about 40 minutes and I actually went back to work.  I had a lot to do and fuck this cancer.

I don't always tell my parents, but I love them and appreciate everything they do for me.  They are so devoted to me and my family and I know that they will do anything to help me through this process.  I am so grateful that they live so close and can be there when I need them...

I am so glad that I went to work today because I had a joyous day with my students.  My beginner flute class had the best chair test that I have heard them play all year, and then they had recital day.  In recital day, each kid gets up in front of the class, announces who she is, what song she is going to play (her choice), performs, and then all the kids are required to clap politely.  My baby flutes played so beautifully.  One trio played a round of Frere Jacques with beautiful vibrato. 

One of the most obnoxious kids that I have in my clarinet class came up to me after school to check on me.  He said he was worried about me and missed me during class.  Now, I have my own personal children that I love more than anything in this world...But I have to say, a very close second are my darling middle school babies.  I really love them too.

I found out today that I can overcome a lot of things...Even giving birth to 5000 white blood cells in the middle of class..I also found out how much I love my job and my students even though I complain a lot.  Really, when I put everything in perspective, teaching middle school band is like being in the Bahamas compared to being sick and in bed.  I really do have a lot to be thankful for.