The gift

I had my surgery on June 10th, 2011 for the removal of a uterine polyp.  I did the usual of not eating or drinking anything after midnight the night before.  I was very nervous the day of the surgery and the entire week before.  I think my nerves came from the fact that this was my 3rd surgery and I thought I knew what was coming.

The surgery was not a big deal at all. Compared to what I have been through, this was the equivalent of a dental cleaning.  I got to the ambulatory hospital at 6 a.m., checked in and sat there until about 6:50 a.m.  (There were a lot of children in the waiting area as well, which kind of brought me some comfort.  If they can handle day surgery, I could too!)  A couple of hours before, I had to take a pill to soften my cervix so that the doctor could dialate the uterus more easily.  The pill disolved on my tongue, tasted like chalk and it gave me a little bit of menstrual cramping.

After I changed into my surgical gown, the nurse gave me my i.v. and I signed all of the necessary paperwork.  Then Elliott and the doctor came in and we talked about what was going to happen.  The doctor told me once again that he didn't anticipate any cancer and that the polyp looked very benign to him and to the radiologist.  (Apparently these polyps are very common in women my age.)  My doctor also told me that I would have the biopsy results of the surgery on the following Tuesday.

At that point, I was wheeled over to the OR, they gave me some gas and then it seemed as though I woke up minutes later.  It was over with so quickly, I could barely remember it starting. I had virtually no pain at all and within 45 minutes I was out of the post-OP room and I was going home.  The rest of the day I slept at home as if I had a hangover, and 1/2 of the next day I was pretty sleepy.  By Monday, I was back to my usual self.

On Tuesday, I called for the results.  They found a polyp and a fibroid and both were benign.  I was with my mom looking for sports wear at the time I found out.  I started crying in the middle of the store I was so relieved.  I hadn't felt that happy in a long time. 

Two days later, I went to school to make a monetary deposit for my band's summer camp.  While I was up there, I went into the main office to say hello to the principal's secretary.  In the office talking with her, was a woman who seemed to have the cancer crew cut.  (The cancer crew cut is my term for the hairdo that someone has after they finish chemo and the hair starts to grow back in.)  The woman turned out to be the principal's secretary at a local high school who is battling breast cancer.  She immediately walked up to me, hugged me, and told me that she was so glad to finally meet me.  I told her that I had heard about her battle with cancer. We embraced many times during our conversation.  We both agreed that it's difficult for others to understand what it's like to have cancer unless you've gone through it yourself.  At one point during our conversation, she said, "Sometimes I wonder when's the last time I'll get to see my son play baseball."  We both started to cry.  I told her that if she wants me to contact her to leave her phone number with the school secretary.  Unfortunately, she didn't..Honestly, I think she forgot because she was so upset and distracted...

After I accomplished about an hour of work, I returned to the main office and spoke with the principal's secretary at our school.  She told me that the woman who was visiting has a stage 4 cancer that will never go away.  It had spread to her lymph nodes and her spine.  The best she could hope for was to keep the cancer at bay and from spreading to her organs.  The reason why she had started growing back some of her hair was because she was taking a couple of month break from the chemo.

After this surgery and this chance meeting with this other cancer patient, I felt so incredibly lucky, blessed, and fortunate to be surviving this disease.  I have been given another chance at life....Everything has been looking brighter and I have been enjoying every minute of every day from the time I wake up until the time I go to sleep.  I no longer complain about the body aches that I have with the tamoxifen...All of that seems so insignificant and trivial.

I have been given such a gift.